[THIS IS TERRIBLE BUT SHE IS RIGHT. Sometimes there's safety in distance even if i aki wish he would stop being a little shit about it
She is also so funny and so valid for this. And also so correct. He really was a very impressionable creature... He just reflected back anything that was around him until he settled on being angry and spiteful forever all on his own, and even then he still reflects bits and pieces of those who spend the most time around him. A mirror! A creature.
He shakes off the memory pretty easily, glancing her way.]
You were so young, then, and so alone. There wasn't much to guide you or lead you....
[ she knows it's too long ago for him to change about it, and she doesn't care enough to argue anything, but she does have a slightly different interpretation of what ei must have met.
even if abandoning scaramouche like that was still a terrible action. ]
[But all true things. His shoulders rise a little. Ei really does her best but she, like all immortals, cannot be normal about anything ever.]
Would you not feel a sense of betrayal if you were created for a specific purpose and then tossed aside like dross? She didn't even have the decency to finish the job.
Edited (THE LAST OF MY SENTENCE) 2025-07-10 05:44 (UTC)
[They really do take a hard pivot from each other here. There's a muddled, distant, hard to pinpoint sort of feeling.]
That was never our relationship.
[Despite the fact that he views Ei as a "mother" in a sense, he's never viewed himself as her child or her as his parent in the way that humans might. MAYBE HE WOULD RATHER BE DEAD RIGHT NOW!! He craves ego death.]
[ she's just saying for someone who wants so much to be a god don't think yourself as such a tool?? it sends a message that she isn't sure scaramouche would like read.
even if he is behaving like a tool. ]
How would you describe your relationship?
[ she doesn't expect him to answer that. ]
Does this truly feel like death to you? I doubt it. It's not much different from living.
[every time i see this lad im like he looks so oz-core i would love to see roxana and oz cr
Scaramouche just goes through the rollercoaster of someone else's lived experience and emotions with the same sort of stoicism he faces most sudden external upsets with. Beyond the borrowed emotions, there's a sort of muted surprise, some flicker of understanding, and the faint disgust that tends to surface whenever he's WITNESS TO THE FOLLY OF MAN. People really are so insane and cruel and for what. For a family dynasty that won't even last a fraction of his own eternal lifespan? He compares humans to ants, but really, they're not even as interesting or productive. Terrible creatures, always eating their own.
After the memory comes to a close, a second or two passes and then he sighs.]
[ funny you say that.... very funny that you say that... i do think roxana and oz cr would be peak tho
even now, remembering her brother's death still affects her. her grief emerges and chokes her even if externally, she's able to mask it much better than in her memories. she takes a moment after he sighs. ]
It is. It always has been.
Edited (i forgot this was a w5 thread) 2025-07-14 02:11 (UTC)
[WHY IS IT FUNNY I SHOULD SAY THAT THIS SCARES ME apps oz to the next game you bring roxana to
Grief is such a foreign emotion to him these days, but it's not like he doesn't remember it, and he dislikes the feel of it second-hand. Loss is bad! Loss is bad.]
What's the point of it all? Power, prestige, position?
[ because he comes back from the dead by some horrible doll magic experiment and has memory and identity issues and is more terrible and murderous and causes international incidents SDFJLSAFASF when would that even be
loss is very bad. so true. at least she reins in her emotions quickly, and her emotions go back to being faint and vague. ]
All of that. My siblings are put through exams every month, and if they place well enough and gain enough achievements, they gain more preferential treatment and rank higher within the family. By my father's rules.
[NOT THE FORBIDDEN GUYYY IM IN TEARS reaches for your psl paws
Sometimes emotions really do bring unpleasant consequences though. They really both just learn to run from their feelings or put them in boxes, as you do. He makes a little bit of a face, and the emotions again are faintly disgusted, but not surprised.]
Humans put in so much effort for such ephemeral things.
[IT'S THE FOLLY OF MEN!!!!! Humans exhaust his ass every day. There's a small sigh.]
In an ideal world, regardless of how short a human's life may be, they wouldn't drag so many others into their own idiotic, pointless struggles.
[It's not that he's soft with kids, exactly, but he definitely gives them more grace than almost anyone else he interacts with. They are just out there hanging out... sometimes being headasses and fools, but largely just minding their own business.
He also kind of wonders who it was that Roxana's brother saw in those moments before his death, though.]
In an ideal world, much shouldn't happen, but ideals remain ideals for a reason. People do work and strive to reach them, but they give in so quickly when things go wrong and to the temptation of something easy.
In the end, when power corrupts, it turns anyone into tools, and the young and innocent suffer for it.
[ children often don't know better yet and are so impressionable, have so much potential. she doesn't excuse every child's behavior, but also grants them more grace because often, they aren't taught better.
she wonders, too, even if the writing is on the wall because this is one of the few things she is so stupid about. ]
[THE WRITING IS ON THE WALL!!!!! Even Scaramouche is like damn he probably saw Roxana, but the fact that she doesn't know makes him uncertain in return. Fortunately for her he has no intention of mulling over the question or indulging in the light curiosity any further than this.]
The repetitive nature of the story of humankind is unpleasant.
[It's like this everywhere, every time. Power corrupts, as it always does. People may strive for ideals, but no one ever makes it. It's always those who deserve it the least who suffer the most. His vibes are evil Grandmother Willow, which i guess is just hanami from jjk.]
But I suppose even for how short-lived humans are, many of you are well aware of it. There must be frustration there, for those with the brain matter to understand that there's something to be frustrated with.
[ thanks for being exactly like how she wants you to be, scaramouche. this is why she's comfortable around him. he doesn't care about her, and he's more tired than annoying in front of her these days. ]
Some cycles can be broken but not nearly enough.
[ and even then, sometimes the broken cycle turns into a different and worse cycle... few become better. evil grandmother willow... that's so valid.
there's a swirl of bitterness and resentment in response to his last words before it fades abruptly. ]
For a natural average lifespan, it's what's expected, and some people are fine with that. Others do try to seek ways to live longer. There are many stories about humans trying to attain immortality.
[He is so tired. He's annoying often but hilariously the more he tolerates a person the less annoying he gets. He just starts philosophizing like a grandpa instead and letting the ennui take the wheel.
Few become better! This is why he is so tired. He's seen it happen so many times, it's so exhausting. There is no rest for anyone in this bitchass world.]
Not nearly enough. [A little echo back, a little shrug. He glances over at the swirl of bitterness and resentment, arching a brow at the quick way it fades.]
True enough. The hubris of humanity often leads them down foolish and pointless paths. I imagine they would be even less tolerable in the worlds where they aren't clearly outranked and outperformed by others.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
She is also so funny and so valid for this. And also so correct. He really was a very impressionable creature... He just reflected back anything that was around him until he settled on being angry and spiteful forever all on his own, and even then he still reflects bits and pieces of those who spend the most time around him. A mirror! A creature.
He shakes off the memory pretty easily, glancing her way.]
Why do you want to know?
no subject
[ she knows it's too long ago for him to change about it, and she doesn't care enough to argue anything, but she does have a slightly different interpretation of what ei must have met.
even if abandoning scaramouche like that was still a terrible action. ]
no subject
[But all true things. His shoulders rise a little. Ei really does her best but she, like all immortals, cannot be normal about anything ever.]
Would you not feel a sense of betrayal if you were created for a specific purpose and then tossed aside like dross? She didn't even have the decency to finish the job.
no subject
Parents aren't supposed to use their children like tools. Would you rather be dead right now?
no subject
That was never our relationship.
[Despite the fact that he views Ei as a "mother" in a sense, he's never viewed himself as her child or her as his parent in the way that humans might. MAYBE HE WOULD RATHER BE DEAD RIGHT NOW!! He craves ego death.]
We're all technically dead right now.
no subject
even if he is behaving like a tool. ]
How would you describe your relationship?
[ she doesn't expect him to answer that. ]
Does this truly feel like death to you? I doubt it. It's not much different from living.
no subject
We don't have one.
[It is an answer and a nonanswer but also a true answer. He's never even met her. There's a little shrug, after.]
Death itself also felt like life even in Hell.
no subject
I don't want to argue about semantics, but didn't you start out dead in Hell? It sounds like you want something else.
no subject
What I want is to get out of this cycle of idiotic games and get back to finishing my work.
[He stumbles into CRAU3 in 2035.]
no subject
There's only a few weeks left. You'll get back to whatever you were doing soon enough, if everyone else has their say.
no subject
Third time's the charm.
[God let him back into his damn house. also give me mem]
no subject
roxana would say something if another memory didn't come. childhood(?) for childhood. ]
no subject
Scaramouche just goes through the rollercoaster of someone else's lived experience and emotions with the same sort of stoicism he faces most sudden external upsets with. Beyond the borrowed emotions, there's a sort of muted surprise, some flicker of understanding, and the faint disgust that tends to surface whenever he's WITNESS TO THE FOLLY OF MAN. People really are so insane and cruel and for what. For a family dynasty that won't even last a fraction of his own eternal lifespan? He compares humans to ants, but really, they're not even as interesting or productive. Terrible creatures, always eating their own.
After the memory comes to a close, a second or two passes and then he sighs.]
What a farce.
[OF A WHOLEASS FAMILY.]
no subject
even now, remembering her brother's death still affects her. her grief emerges and chokes her even if externally, she's able to mask it much better than in her memories. she takes a moment after he sighs. ]
It is. It always has been.
no subject
Grief is such a foreign emotion to him these days, but it's not like he doesn't remember it, and he dislikes the feel of it second-hand. Loss is bad! Loss is bad.]
What's the point of it all? Power, prestige, position?
no subject
loss is very bad. so true. at least she reins in her emotions quickly, and her emotions go back to being faint and vague. ]
All of that. My siblings are put through exams every month, and if they place well enough and gain enough achievements, they gain more preferential treatment and rank higher within the family. By my father's rules.
no subject
She is so relatable though. He too prefers to keep all of his emotions in a box and crams them back in very quickly when they escape.]
A man with a good deal of control-related personal issues, obviously. [OBVIOUSLY.] What does he even do? Is he a ruler of any nation?
no subject
emotions usually bring consequences she doesn't like, so it's better to make them go away. ]
He isn't subtle, but yes... he is head of one of the five most powerful families of the continent. It's split into five territories.
no subject
Sometimes emotions really do bring unpleasant consequences though. They really both just learn to run from their feelings or put them in boxes, as you do. He makes a little bit of a face, and the emotions again are faintly disgusted, but not surprised.]
Humans put in so much effort for such ephemeral things.
no subject
[ her lips twist into a humorless smile. ]
Our lives are short enough as is, so those kinds of things are attractive to the masses. It's the folly of men.
no subject
In an ideal world, regardless of how short a human's life may be, they wouldn't drag so many others into their own idiotic, pointless struggles.
[It's not that he's soft with kids, exactly, but he definitely gives them more grace than almost anyone else he interacts with. They are just out there hanging out... sometimes being headasses and fools, but largely just minding their own business.
He also kind of wonders who it was that Roxana's brother saw in those moments before his death, though.]
no subject
In the end, when power corrupts, it turns anyone into tools, and the young and innocent suffer for it.
[ children often don't know better yet and are so impressionable, have so much potential. she doesn't excuse every child's behavior, but also grants them more grace because often, they aren't taught better.
she wonders, too, even if the writing is on the wall because this is one of the few things she is so stupid about. ]
no subject
The repetitive nature of the story of humankind is unpleasant.
[It's like this everywhere, every time. Power corrupts, as it always does. People may strive for ideals, but no one ever makes it. It's always those who deserve it the least who suffer the most. His vibes are evil Grandmother Willow, which i guess is just hanami from jjk.]
But I suppose even for how short-lived humans are, many of you are well aware of it. There must be frustration there, for those with the brain matter to understand that there's something to be frustrated with.
no subject
Some cycles can be broken but not nearly enough.
[ and even then, sometimes the broken cycle turns into a different and worse cycle... few become better. evil grandmother willow... that's so valid.
there's a swirl of bitterness and resentment in response to his last words before it fades abruptly. ]
For a natural average lifespan, it's what's expected, and some people are fine with that. Others do try to seek ways to live longer. There are many stories about humans trying to attain immortality.
no subject
Few become better! This is why he is so tired. He's seen it happen so many times, it's so exhausting. There is no rest for anyone in this bitchass world.]
Not nearly enough. [A little echo back, a little shrug. He glances over at the swirl of bitterness and resentment, arching a brow at the quick way it fades.]
True enough. The hubris of humanity often leads them down foolish and pointless paths. I imagine they would be even less tolerable in the worlds where they aren't clearly outranked and outperformed by others.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)