disingenuous | kashuu catchall

[It's true - he has a heart that can judge, even if it often doesn't. Not in the way a human's would, anyway. But he has his biases, he has his sentiments, his preferences, his beliefs, his fury and his love.

At his core, he's not human. But there are flecks of humanity threaded all throughout him, inseparable from his being like it's been imparted through the human hands that forged him.

He gives Roxana's hand a gentle squeeze, and his smile is as old as the dried riverbeds he'd lived in for hundreds of years, watching humanity at its worst whittle itself away.]

Thanks for being here, too. For letting me know you and love you.

[Even if it's uncomfortable. Even if there are doubtlessly many parts of Roxana he still doesn't know yet, in all the beautiful and terrible shades of humanity she comes in.]

I hope this won't be the end, but if it is... I'm really glad that I got to meet you.

Mm. Me, too.

[ Her words are soft, soft in the way that she peeled back enough layers to be real and raw. ]

If it is the end, I'll miss you.

[ More than she can quantify, more than she'd put into words as she is now.

She remembers how he told her where he came from, what he had to see and experience, but when you get lost in your own head, it's hard to find how others look at you in ways you don't expect. ]

... Know you'll always be beautiful where it counts the most.

[the sound of ara sliding in after endgame to kneecap me with this tag and me needing to take a 2 day nap about it

But!! Both of these things mean a lot to him, in the end. The fact that he's important enough, cherished enough, to be missed in the first place. That she finds him beautiful in the ways that matter. There are a lot of things about the aches he carries that can't be soothed, and he wonders someday if he'll ever see his wounds fully healed. But little moments like this help to build him, bit by bit, into something - someone - better than before.

There's warmth and something a little melancholic in his smile.]

Geez, you're really spoiling me tonight, huh? ...I hope I won't have the time or space to miss you too much, but if I do... I'll remember this, too.

[To carry part of the people you hold dear with you is one of the greatest blessings of a human heart, after all. Without fail, he makes good use of it.]

[ this is what you get for getting cr with me.... while playing someone who cares.

Words can't heal years of pain and trauma, but they mean something, if true, and she doesn't see much reason not to say untrue things to Kashuu on this last night together. She is prepared to miss him and never see him again.

(She is prepared to not be loved in this way again.)

She laughs a little. The only melancholy is in her eyes, not in her laughter. ]

I've seen and heard enough of your missions to be realistic, Kiyomitsu, but tonight, we should be as selfish as we can.

[ Roxana does a lot of things that are selfish, but not usually quite in this way. ]

And that means spoiling ourselves silly.

[ It's the least they can do after everything they've had to go through and what they have yet to go through. ]

kashuu catchall

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